…February’s “V-Days”

I have been witnessing an interesting twist to an old tradition. I remember that, as I was growing up, the month of February used to be a month to celebrate “love and friendship,” particularly in relation to Saint Valentine’s day; the elusive figure from the early years of Christianity for whom it is difficult to find historical evidence. As you know, this is a welcome occasion for many companies that sell all things imaginable that may be related to friendship and beyond… greeting cards, candy, chocolates, flowers, movies, songs, books, intimate apparel, jewelry, romantic getaways, dinners, and everything in between!

As I reviewed two years ago, this holiday generates spending in our nation to the tune of “teen billions” in sales. Last year, the National Retail Federation (NRF) expected a dip in sales from the previous year: $14.7 Bn in 2009, compared to $17.02 Bn in 2008 –in case you were wondering, no estimates for this particular festivity were publicly available for 2010 at the time of this writing, but a projected increase of 2.5% in sales for 2010 leads me to believe that we might see a slight bump.

NRF’s data also shows that only the end of the year and the return to school generate larger sales than “V-day;” not even Mother’s or Father’s day, Easter, Halloween, the Super Bowl or Saint Patrick’s day inspire our nation to open our wallets as we do in the middle of February. And, of course we are not the only ones stimulating the economic cycles; all around the world, there are variations that celebrate love and friendship, with the exception of cultures that explicitly reject Western influences as do some Hindi and Saudi Arabians.

Where is “the Twist”?
For the past decade or so, I have been observing an increase in popularity, scope, and support for a different type of “V-Day,” the movement created by Eve Ensler, the author of The Vagina Monologues. I would be surprised if you haven’t heard about it, as universities and community centers all over the US have been organizing readings of this work on or around February 14. What started as a presentation of diverse feminine experiences (including one that was highly questionable to say the least) has become a world-wide movement that demands a stop to all forms of violence and abuse against women.

I will admit that the monologues were not particularly appealing to me when their dissemination started. The reviews I read cautioned that one of the segments offered a highly appreciative portrayal of a lesbian rape of an underage, drunken girl, while most other segments categorically condemned –as they should!—any violence perpetrated by males. Critics also pointed out how harmonious relationships between men and women are not given enough “air time” within the event, compared to traumatic encounters. Others have criticized the “hijacking” of St. Valentine’s Day and in a few countries –including European ones like Monte Carlo or Monaco—the piece has been found vulgar or tasteless.

The Redemption of the Monologues?
Still, the activism that this movement has been generating is worth a close look. Among the most noticeable outcomes of the V-Day movement we find a dozen festivals prominently covered by the mainstream media thanks to the support of well-known personalities; thousands of benefit events in cities around the world; and a great deal of grass-roots events with the purpose of educating, raising funds and supporting organizations that year-round help victims of domestic and other types of violence. This year the focus is on the women of the Democratic Republic of Congo, one of many fronts that, thanks to its marginal socio-political status, has gone largely unnoticed by the media. Kudos to Ensler for using in this way the notoriety that her V-Day movement has acquired!!

Another initiative that I find laudable is the grass-roots creation of a V-Men event for 2011. Within the next few weeks, focus groups will be joining men who are willing to contribute their own experiences, thoughts and other resources to stop the violence against women. As a researcher on women’s experiences at the workplace who also happens to be the husband of an amazing woman, father of two little girls, brother of another two great women, and son of a most loving home-based activist, I can only strongly recommend this effort that surely will eliminate the criticism that V-Day is a “man hating” event.

Should We Have a “BV-Day”?
Considering all the disadvantages that women encounter in business –the gender pay gap, the glass ceiling, mommy tracks, double-duty, tokenism, glass cliffs, stereotyped treatment, difficulties in finding mentors and career advocates, to name just a few—perhaps we ought to have a “BV-Day.” At least once a year, we, in the world of Business, should stop to reflect how a very subtle type of violence is perpetrated against some of the smartest, hardest working, underappreciated individuals who just happen to have a body that is different from those of us in the majority.

What do you think? Feel free to send me an email to drolivaslujan_at_gmail.com or post your comment on my facebook or LinkedIn page.

¡Hasta la próxima!

To learn more:

This Wikipedia entry summarizes what is currently known about Saint Valentine: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_Valentine

The National Retail Federation publishes data on consumer spending through the following website: http://www.nrf.com/

Ensler’s Vday organization’s website is at: http://www.vday.org/home

…panhandling for charity

“I am panhandling!!!”

I don’t think the first person had left me speaking to the air when I realized it... All those years in college, books and articles authored, speeches and conferences in exotic places around the world, a half-decent salary, and here I am, a Full University Professor, asking for shoppers’ spare change! Should I just have sent a check instead of signing up for two hours of “canhandling” (my friends and I actually were using cans, not pans)? “This is going to be much longer than I ever thought,” I said to myself...

And indeed, the first few times I was ignored or rejected by a passerby’s grumble or some other non-verbal show of disgust, I felt that I was wasting my time and embarrassing myself. Of course, a couple of students and colleagues were surprised to see me asking for donations! I was not the only “canhandler” outside one of our local big-box retailers volunteering for our local chapter of “The Arc -Pennsylvania” (the acronym means “Advocacy and Resources for Citizens with cognitive, intellectual, and developmental disabilities” and it’s part of a national organization for disabled individuals). But the thought that so many people were behaving toward me like I had undoubtedly behaved toward other fund-raising individuals in the past was not a very comforting one. Even the cute plastic rulers we were giving away made no effect on the shoppers who were too busy to even hear what I had to say!

“Well, if I volunteered to two hours of begging for a worthy cause, I better get some results!” I thought. I started by shortening the “elevator pitch” I first had used. Heck, the attention span I was being given lasted less than an elevator doors closing! “Would you consider making a donation to The Arc, an association of disabled citizens...” evolved into “Can you give some change to help disabled persons?” At last, people started paying attention to what I was saying!

Then I started seeking visual contact with my prospective donors, thanking them for their attention and smiling even if they did not give any money. Some coins, a few bills started trickling into my can. I also started giving away the rulers to shoppers that were entering the store, and quite a few of them would deposit their spare change in my can when they left the store.

I also encountered a few people that were so jaded –or simply were having a bad day; who knows? A few questioned my motives. Did I work for The Arc? (No...) How much was I getting in return for my time? (Zero!) Did I have a job? (Yes, one of the most desirable jobs you can find!) Did I have a disabled family member? (No, but I have seen what a blessing -and a challenge--they can be to families that do.)

Then, other individuals’ generosity truly touched my heart. Some did not mind taking out a larger bill or two, and often they were not the best dressed or best groomed; in fact, several seemed to be in need of money as well. Others told me how The Arc had made such a difference in their lives by providing much needed services to their loved ones. But the one that got my eyes wet was a teenager with an obvious disability who heard my pitch and beat her parents to her own purse, almost falling to the ground in the attempt. I believe that her disability was not so strong that she could not understand and empathize with others; she also realized that she could help others by helping me with her own resources... and she did, happily and earnestly, even putting herself in danger!

Honestly, these persons made me realize what a difference it can make in other people’s lives to just give a few coins or bills. They helped me re-experience first-hand the hope that collective action can provide on behalf of those who need us. I have known this for so long but it had been a long time since I had actually done something that would make me feel it so strongly. I even have students who take my “Business, Society and Corporate Conduct” course choose and report on a Service Learning experience of their own choice! I do this so they get “outside their comfort zones” and better empathize with those whose needs are much greater than ours. This experience helped me realize that there is much more value in this than we can describe with words.

It might go without saying, but serving others through your local chapter of NSHMBA can also be a source of most valuable experiences. There is incredible value in helping those that are earlier in their careers, or in helping those that are transitioning in their careers. Get more involved! You might learn more about yourself than you ever thought!

What do you think? Would you like to share a similar experience? Have you been in touch with organizations like The Arc that benefit others that are disadvantaged? Send me your thoughts or suggestions via email (drolivaslujan_at_gmail.com), facebook, or LinkedIn.

¡Hasta la próxima!